A ll our senior government officials are lousy at making speeches. They do not make eye contact with the audience. They just read out their long and boring speeches without looking up. To make eye contact means to look at the people you are talking to. People who are good at making speeches know eye contact is important. Audiences lose interest and attention when speakers just read from their speeches. I must own up that I always nod off during budget speeches. To "nod off" means to fall asleep even though you don't want to.
It is unnecessary for the financial secretary to waste about two hours reading out his budget speech in the Legislative Council. Many legislative councillors, and even senior government officials, nod off during budget speeches. He will make everyone happy if he just reads out a summary and gives copies of the full speech to those who want it. But he must still allow time for Longhair Leung Kwok-hung to throw things at him because many people watch the budget speech on TV just to see that. If Tsang Chun-wah doesn't like my idea of a summary, then I have another idea to stop people from nodding off. He can have giant (very big) screens behind him, which he can use to show girlie movies while he is reading his budget. People who get bored listening to him can watch the girlie movies. I am sure Ho Chun-yan would love it.
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我想own up，即是我想坦白招供。這個習語一般是某人想承認自己做錯時用到。立法會議員何俊仁招認（owned up），自己在財政司司長曾俊華發表財政預算案時，用iPad觀看少女艷照（girlie pictures）。他必須坦白招供（own up），因為記者拍到他看少女艷照（girlie pictures）。但我也得承認（own up），要是我得聽曾俊華預算案演講，我也會看美女艷照（girlie pictures）。Girlie pictures就是女人穿得暴露或裸體的艷照，刊登艷照（girlie pictures）的雜誌就被稱為girlie magazines。
我們所有的政府高官演講時都很糟。他們從不與觀眾有眼神接觸（eye contact）。他們只會眼不離稿，讀出那冗長沉悶的講辭。To make eye contact就是跟你說話的對象有眼神接觸。擅於演講的人都知道，眼神接觸（eye contact）是非常重要的。若講者只顧讀出講稿，觀眾便會失去興趣和專注力。我得坦白承認（own up），我在預算案演說期間亦常常「釣魚」（nod off）。Nod off即是打瞌睡。
財政司司長要浪費兩小時在立法會讀他的預算案講辭，根本多此一舉。許多立法會議員，甚至是政府高官，都會在預算案演說期間「釣魚」（nod off）。如果他只是讀出摘要，再向大家派發詳盡講辭，那便皆大歡喜了。不過，他得容許長毛梁國雄向他擲東西，好讓許多在電視上觀看預算案發表的觀眾能看得到。要是曾俊華不喜歡我那只讀撮要的構思，我有另一提議，令人們不會打瞌睡（nodding off）。他可以在背後設置一個超大（giant）的熒幕，當他讀預算案時，就用那熒幕來播色情（girlie）小電影。悶得發慌的人便可看那些色情（girlie）電影。我肯定，何俊仁一定愛死了這個裝置。
mickchug@gmail.com
中譯:七刻
Michael Chugani 褚簡寧
Source: http://news.stheadline.com/dailynews/headline_news_detail_columnist.asp?id=276555§ion_name=wtt&kw=126