A s I tossed these ideas around I received several junk calls. That made my writer's block worse. I wanted to tear my hair out. Every time I receive a junk call I pretend I don't know how to speak Cantonese. Most junk callers can't speak English and so I always say: "What? What?" They will then ask: "Do you speak Cantonese?" I always say: "No." They will then hang up. The word junk can be used in many different ways. It means a kind of Chinese boat with a sail.
But as a slang word it means rubbish. Junk food means unhealthy, fast food. Junk calls are phone calls from people who try to sell you things. Writer's block is when a writer is unable to write anything no matter how hard he tries. Tossing ideas around in your head means to think of and consider different ideas. To bicker means to quarrel over small things. A brainless person is a stupid or unintelligent person. I think Hong Kong has many brainless politicians. When you say you want to tear your hair out it means you are very frustrated or angry. But you don't actually tear out your hair! I have always wondered if bald people use this expression. I am very proud of myself. I managed to write this column even though I have writer's block.
***
我苦於文思枯竭（writer's block），單是這篇專欄就花了我好幾個小時，想來想去也不知該寫甚麼。有幾個想法在腦海中盤旋（tossed ideas around in my head），但不知道該寫哪一個。我該寫寫奧巴馬勝出美國大選？抑或寫寫國家主席胡錦濤在中共十八大的講話？還是我該寫一寫有關政府計劃發放每月二千二百元長者生活津貼的這場政治爭吵（bickering）？我同意政府應該只讓有需要的長者領取津貼。我認為有些立法會議員，要求發放給所有長者，連不需要這筆錢的人都包括在內，都是沒腦的（brainless）。
當我翻來覆去的想着這幾個點子（tossed these ideas around）之際，竟又收到幾個垃圾電話（junk calls）。本來枯竭的文思（writer's block）更形枯竭，我真的要抓狂（tear my hair out）了。每一次收到垃圾電話（junk call），我總會裝作不懂說廣東話。大部份打垃圾電話來的人（junk callers）都不懂說英語，於是我總會說：「甚麼？甚麼？」他們就會問：「你懂說廣東話嗎？」我說：「不。」然後他們便會收線。Junk這個字可以有幾種用法。它可以解作中國帆船。
但在俗語中，它就解作垃圾。Junk food是垃圾食物，即是不健康食物或快餐。Junk calls就是廣告或傳銷電話。Writer's block是當一個寫作的人無論怎樣努力，也寫不出甚麼來。Tossing ideas around in your head即是想到和考慮到不同的想法。To bicker即是在小事上爭吵。A brainless person就是一個愚笨的人。我認為香港有許多愚笨的（brainless）從政者。當你說你想tear your hair out，即是說你很懊惱或憤怒，但你可不會真的扯掉頭髮！我常常想，到底禿頭的人會不會用這個習語。我為自己感到自豪，即使我文思枯竭（writer's block），我仍然寫好了這篇專欄。mickchug@gmail.com
中譯:七刻
Michael Chugani 褚簡寧